wishing

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Summer, 2015

Sometimes wishing hurts, as when you're wishing for something that you know you just can't have. It's so easy to "dwell on dreams and forget to live", as Dumbledore so wisely conveys to Harry in the Sorcerer's Stone. (Yes, wisdom can be discerned from even secular movies, with the right worldview.)

I have so much to be thankful for, so much to be excited about, so much to do... And yet, I know there is one thing I want more than anything in this world, and waiting is... *sigh*... oh, it's so hard!

Yet as I often quote to myself, 'What is easy is worth little; what is fought for tirelessly is priceless.'

I will wait, because I know it will be worth it, and I will thank the Lord for what I have. He is good! So good....

{Post-marriage, Summer 2016}

I'm living in a dream! The very dream I've had since my childhood. The very fantasy of having a husband, a home of my own, a wedding ring around my finger, of having a husband who loves the Lord... This dream came true this April 30th. I've been a Mrs. 3 months, and already it has been a joyful and fulfilling experience.

Brandyn is the most patient man, the most gentle, the most humble, and has strength and a work ethic to match. I can't believe God has blessed me - ME! - with such a man!

In addition to all of the pleasures, I have experienced the temptations in marriage; for example, the impulse to be sarcastic, short, selfish, and overall sinful. I cannot name even once when Brandyn has failed me, but I fail him every day. It is supremely humbling, convicting, and sanctifying to have him daily by my side. And I love him! My affection has in no way dwindled, and neither my devotion. Though I fail him daily, "a righteous man falls seven times and rises again", and so I press on and seek by the Lord's strength to do better.

I am blessed by the opportunity to help him by doing the laundry, cooking, and dishes, and I love waking up at 5am to make him breakfast before work. It's a healthy toil to deny myself a little extra sleep and bless him.

He helps me too! He keeps me on track, pays the bills, answers most of the emails, and makes the decisions in the way only a godly man who loves the Lord can. And I couldn't do any of this without him.

One of the brightest highlights of my day is seeing his face after work, and jumping into his arms for a big hug and kiss.

Best of all, by far, is being able to read the Bible and pray consistently with him every day! I read to him in the early morning hour, and he reads to me before we go to sleep.

I don't deserve this, but I thank the Lord that He gave it to me anyway. This really is a dream come true; no more wishing for me!

"Nutshelling"

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April 6th, 2016

Proposal, wedding planning, work, sleep...

This sums up most of my life from the past few months. Cam you believe it? I'm getting married! I found him, the man of my dreams, and after waiting and praying for over a year, he proposed. To ME!

My life has been a bittersweet blend of happy, eventful, and also sad. In the midst of the wedding planning, I watched my grandmother learn that she had cancer, go through a session of chemo, say farewell to the people who love her dearly, and finally "slip the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God."

I didn't want to accept it at first. Grandma was one of my best friends, and I feel ashamed to remember all that she sacrificed for me when returned so little of her kindness. I'm going to miss her very much.
    Planning a wedding while I watched her slowly die seemed so wrong. At the end, I took time off work and stayed with my family so that I could be there for them all. I will never regret that. I also was privileged to speak at my grandma's funeral this past weekend. I wish she could have been at my wedding. I know she's full of joy in heaven with the Lord right now, and that makes it easier to let her go.

Now, with my wedding just over the weeks away, I'm a busy girl. Is it a sin to forego house cleaning when your life is practically a disaster? I work, I go home, I accomplish more wedding planning, and I go to bed. My dear Brandyn has been a huge help planning our wedding. Right away when we started, I told him it was OUR wedding, not just mine, and so I wanted to make sure that everything we planned passed his approval first, from the invitation, to the flowers, to the color scheme. I couldn't have done all of this without him - which is good, because we'll be working together for, Lord willing, many years to come!

Brandyn is a gem. He's the sunshine in my cloudy life. I love him so much! I'm thankful the wait to marry him is nearly at an end!

Now you know why I haven't had much time to write. We fiances have to keep busy! Since you've been caught up, I hope to write often from now on. Thank you for reading; it's good to know that someone out there cares to read about my humdrum life. =)

the little things...and the big ones

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Three weeks ago, my older sister was married. It was not really so strange; we had been planning the wedding for months, and my future brother-in-law had already long-since been wholly accepted into our family... all of the pieces fell into place. It was just a bit strange, a bit surreal because while growing up, since I was very little, I tried to imagine what this would be like, watching as my siblings grew up and married and started their own lives and families, but now it is actually happening. In the back of my head, I could never really picture separating from my sisters. We've always been a threesome; we grew up doing everything together. It is strange to see old photos and realize they are 'old'. It's strange to look in a mirror and see a woman, instead of my tiny little face barely able to peer over the counter-top. Life itself is a little strange. It really is not so different from the way it was in the beginning; marriage, children, growing up, marriage, children, growing up... it is a cycle billions of people before me have taken part in, but now it has come to my turn, and I am marveling. It is a peculiar blessing because although I have always dreamed of this stage of life, I could not truly imagine the intermingled joy and moments of stress and sadness I 'knew' would come... such as crying as I gave my speech after the ceremony while people were eating their cake. I knew all this would happen, but now that it is here, it feels strange.

There is no other way I can think to describe it; no words adequate enough to explain the sensation that what is finally real feels so surreal; so dreamlike. I suppose it is one of those things you cannot imagine without feeling it for yourself. My descriptions are lacking.

My sister's bed is empty; the cup for our toothbrushes is one toothbrush short; the closets are devoid of probably a couple dozen pairs of shoes... Life definitely changes, but somehow - possibly the strangest part of all - is that even though there has been much 'lost', there is so much excitement for the new things to come! That is the thought I will hold on to... new things to come. 'Treasure the little things.' 'God is as sovereign today as He was yesterday.' 'In Christ alone.'

I have a new big brother! My big sister is happily married and homemaking, and both she and her husband are being blessed by the Lord! It has already been three weeks since their wedding! Wow... Praise the Lord!

thank You for the little things

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Thank You, Lord, for tea biscuits, for long walks at dusk,
    for bronze mailbox numbers that reflect light like lava.

Thank You for books upon books - more than one can read in a lifetime!

Thank You for friends, who love me even when I feel most alone;
    for family that wraps me up in 'snuggly' hugs
    and tell me that they love me.

Thank You for cameras, for Drama Class, for fifteen choices of tea.

Thank You for alarm clocks - even when I want least to wake up.

Thank You for table lamps, cookbooks, video games, and pillows.

Thank You for fingers for typing and playing piano; for prayer, for stories,
    for funny TV shows, for John MacArthur sermons,
    for a building for my church to worship in.

Thank You for voices with which to sing praises to You!

Thank You for watch faces that spin an tick a happy tune in my ear,
    for cat food dishes, for autumn orange hand-knit blankets,
    for green jeans, for stuffed toy bunnies.

Thank You for wilted roses, for shiny silver earrings, for recycled paper notebooks,
    for bottles full of moss, for unscented lotion,
    for Swedish dolls that stack inside of each other.

Thank You for dried flowers, for eyeglasses, for chopsticks, for 'present' rings.

Thank You for tales by the Brothers Grimm, for emery boards, for postage stamps.

Thank You for sandwiches, for ribbons, for electrical cords, for backpacks.

Thank You for the little things, 
    the forgotten things, 
    the things we take for granted.

weather or not

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I am not much of one for beating around the bush, so here I go...

Whether or not others agree, I have - all winter and spring long - been finding the occasional snow to be quite a treat; whether or not some or all others complain that April is no time for snow and we 'deserve' better weather, I firmly say, "It is God's prerogative to send us whatever weather He so desires. Whatever He deems best is best, and I am not clay to argue with the Potter who formed me."

Last Saturday night, my mother read aloud a most excellent excerpt from Jerry Bridges' book, Trusting God. I am so glad that she felt led to share it with me and my sisters, and I feel led right now to pass along the blessed words to you. Hang on to your hat, unless you find yourself guilty.

"Complaining about the weather seems to be a favorite American pastime. Sadly, we Christians often get caught up in this ungodly habit of our society. But when we complain about the weather, we are actually complaining against God who sent us our weather. We are, in fact, sinning against God (see Numbers 11:1).
    Not only do we sin against God when we complain about the weather, we also deprive ourselves of the peace that comes from recognizing our heavenly Father is in control of it. [...] Whether the weather merely disrupts my plans or destroys my home, I need to learn to see God's sovereign and loving hand controlling it.
    The fact is, for most of us, the weather and the effects of nature are usually favorable. The tornado, the drought, even the snowstorm that delays our flight are the exception not the rule. We tend to remember the "bad" weather and take for granted the good. However, when Jesus spoke about the weather, He spoke about the goodness of God: "He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous" (Matthew 5:45).
    Though God sometimes uses the weather and other expressions of nature as instruments of judgment (see Amos 4:7-9), He most often uses weather as an expression of His gracious provision for His creation. Both saint and sinner alike benefit from God's gracious provision of weather. And, according to Jesus, this provision is not merely the result of certain fixed, inexorable physical laws. God controls those laws. He causes His sun to rise, He sends the rain.
    God has indeed established certain physical laws for the operation of His universe; yet moment by moment those laws operate according to His direct will. Again Alexander Carson put it so well when he said, "The sun and the rain minister to the nourishment and comfort equally of the righteous and the wicked, not from the necessity of general laws, but from the immediate providence of Him who, in the government of the world, wills this result."
    We as Christians need to stop complaining about the weather and instead learn to give thanks for it. God, our heavenly Father, sends us each day what He deems best for all of His creation."

Very good stuff. In fact, I would have written all about this in my own words, but I really could not have said it better myself.

So, whether or not creation is yielding weather to your liking, please choose to be thankful and even praise God for the "bad" weather. He knows best.

treasure the little things

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Thanksgiving is here. As exciting as it can be, shopping for dinner rolls or cans of cranberry sauce, rushing around decorating and going someplace to celebrate the plenty with which God has blessed this generation, I am going to assume that many of you feel you do not have much to be thankful for. Perhaps there are not many or even any incredibly wowing events in your life at the moment. Perhaps it is quite the opposite, that there is many a hardship which you are struggling through presently, many a person whose relationship with you seems irreparable. Perhaps there has been death or sickness, or other suffering in your life which puts that empty hollow in your chest, so that you feel you do not have the happiness you believe you should on such a holiday. Well, I hope to remedy this abject thinking. I am not going to give a long lecture on the pilgrims and their hardships and their thankfulness on the providence of God, although this is a wonderful fact of history to be reminded of. I want to explain the title of this chapter and how it applies to tomorrow. Read on.

Almost exactly a year ago when I began taking some portrait sessions for others, I came up with a slogan, if you will, for my photography: treasure the little things. I suppose I have not actually begun to use it yet on Alabaster Rose Photography (my Facebook page), but I say it often anyway, because aside from photography, I have short proverbs or mottos I like to quote to myself and others, more of which I shall probably blog about soon enough, but this one seemed best fitting at present. As said before, in this life there oft seems to be very little to be thankful for. Now I make a practice to never allow myself to ask God why things are not better than they are. Instead, I thank Him for the little things. Believe me, when you really think about it, you have so much to thank Him for.

Every single day when I wake up, I thank God for the day.

It is so simple, but life itself is an incredible blessing which we do not deserve! I could go on for pages and pages about God’s grace to everyone in allowing us to live even though we are all sinners and deserve death! It is part of His ‘common grace’, the grace given to both those who are Saved by faith in Christ Jesus, and to those who have never heard His name or worse, outright refused Him. Life is a precious gift that everyone takes for granted.

I thank God for every single meal I eat.

I have only ever gone hungry a very few times in my entire life. Not everyone can say that. In fact, there are millions of people in the world who can probably say that they have only ever had their stomachs filled a very few times in their life! Some perhaps have never even had an entire meal before. I get to wake up every day and have the problem of deciding what I want to eat. This is a gift from God. May I never dare to forget such a gift! On Thanksgiving especially I always think about the turkey, the cranberry sauce, and all of the staples of the season which are really privileges and blessings, not requirements, and one which many others certainly do not have the means to enjoy as we do. This is another subject I could go on talking about for hours, as it is one that breaks my heart; the idea of starving children compared with we who are rich – for we who have funds enough to purchase pleasures on top of our daily needs certainly are very, very rich – gorging ourselves on more food than our stomachs need because of the tradition of celebrating plenty. It is barbaric. It is heartbreaking. I thank the Lord for my plenty, and I pray for the poor over nearly every bite, and give when I can so that they may be filled. (James 2:15-16, Luke 6:31)

I thank God for my family.

Obviously not everyone has family. Who might they celebrate with on Thanksgiving? Might they celebrate at all? I have family. In fact, there is not one close member of my family – not one grandparent, not one cousin, not one brother or sister or parent who has died in my life. The great-grandparents whom I was too young to know have died. Distant relations and friends of friends have died. Many, many pets have died. In fact, the closest creatures to me who have ever died, human or animal, have been my cats. I cannot know this heartbreak, though I know that I shall have my share of it one day. This presence of all of the people whom I love in my life is a most rare and precious gift. Better still, though not all Saved, I do not have any family members with whom I do not get along. And I will thank the Lord even should these relationships crumble. I will thank the Lord even when I lose to death the people closest to me. He is sovereign, and I will thank him for the time I have had getting-along with and loving my family.

I thank God for books, I thank Him for knitting, I thank Him for blankets, for tea, for paper, my house, my own bedroom, for my last living and very dear cat, for lamps, candles, pens, my laptop, writing, memories, thick socks, the biting cold weather, my leaf collection, my moss necklace from one of my best and dearest friends, flowering plants, the piano, pumpkin pie, dry and moist skin, chocolate milk, the Hobbit movies and book, long and short car trips, singing, walking, sleeping, our cozy sofas, recipes, long nights, long mornings, long in-betweens, for babysitting, for all of my dear friends, and yes, even for my bright pink bedroom walls.

The point is, when it comes down to it, we have much to be thankful for. Count your blessings this season; remember how much God has given to you. And treasure the little things.

the giving tree

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There is pain that builds character and a pain which over time makes strong

yet the pain of a broken heart sadly lasts so dreadfully long

I fight a losing battle with myself against my hopes and dreams each day

and suffer the consequences with tears when I fail to seek God's way

Puritan Prayer
"Holy Lord, I have sinned times without number, and been guilty of pride and unbelief, of failure to find Your mind in Your Word, of neglect to seek You in my daily life. My transgressions and short-comings present me with a list of accusations, but I bless You that they will not stand against me, for all have been laid on Christ. Go on to subdue my corruptions, and grant me grace to live above them. Let not the passions of the flesh nor lustings of the mind bring my spirit into subjection, but rule over me in liberty and power. I thank You that many of my prayers have been refused. I have asked amiss and do not have, I have prayed from lusts and been rejected, I have longed for Egypt and been given a wilderness. Go on with Your patient work, answering 'no' to my wrongful prayers, and fitting me to accept it. Purge me from every false desire, every base aspiration, everything contrary to Your rule. I thank You for Your wisdom and Your love, for all the acts of discipline to which I am subject, for sometimes putting me into the furnace to refine my gold and remove my dross. No trial is so hard to bear as a sense of sin. If You should give me choice to live in pleasure and keep my sins, or to have them burnt away with trial, give me sanctified affliction. Deliver me from every evil habit, every accretion of former sins, everything that dims the brightness of Your grace in me, everything that prevents me taking delight in You. Then I shall bless You, God of jeshurun, for helping me to be upright."

I wish to be like the giving tree, giving and giving with unconditional love, until there is nothing left of me. I want to earn treasure in heaven rather than fight for perishing treasures here on earth. I want to make others happy. I want God to be glorified. I want what I do not want because what I want is not right; therefore I want to stop wanting it so that what I want most is that of wanting what God wants more than what I want; but if what I want turns out to be what God wants, than I want nothing more.

Patience, time, and prayer.

Mueller wedding favourites

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the parlor of life

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I have been attempting to read more of late. And write. And spend time with people. And balance an impossible number of activities on my plate as I saunter through the parlor of life.

So many distractions. So many interesting things that tempt me to turn away from my course. I look back and can see the marks on the rugs where I had been dragging my feet against the Lord's will for my life.

    Up ahead, some windows are open, some yet still closed. Where is He taking me? What is the destiny that lies on the not-yet-tread path before me?

To make my life a little more balanced, I usually choose one or two activities that must be accomplished and pour my whole day into making certain they are deliberately and effectively taken care of.
    Oh, the many weddings I have seen these past two seasons -- folders and folders of photos to edit! Oh, the plans, the books to read, the people to see... My sweet sister phrased it as being such a blessing that we have so many beautiful things to compete for our time. A blessing indeed. That is a better way of looking at it than, 'I never have enough time to do everything!'

My older sister, Lilly, is off in California presently, visiting two of her dear friends who are there for college. She has been excitedly planning this trip for many weeks, and now it is thenceforth commenced! I have been praying for her often since I awoke this morning; ill as I have been with a cold, I could not accompany her with my mom and other sister to the airport to see her off, but I know she is in the Lord's hands. She has arrived there safely, and I am certain will have a full and precious time there, and return home also in safety.

    With all hope, my younger sister, Emily, will be able to win their homecoming volleyball game tomorrow evening. When determined, she and her friends make an excellent team. These girls have never played better than they have this season, so much have they improved since last year when they started out practically from scratch!

    I also hope to be able to enjoy some fellowship with some of my dear youth group after the game -- Ultimate Frisbee (although I will probably only watch and take pictures), some delicious food, and time in God's Word and prayer.

    And this Saturday, if all goes well and I am healthy enough, I will be visiting my dear friend, second-cousin, and pen-pal on campus at her college. Freshly graduated, Elaine is my friend from Illinois whom I only very rarely get to spend time with. We became best friends through writing letters faithfully since early 2007, and I have not seen her in months. I am very excited that she has come to Minnesota for college; visits will surely be more regular than before!

    Ah, life.
It does become crowded, and not everything occurs just the way you want it to, nor is everything that occurs something you would have wanted in the first place! In my case, however, I am learning to be thankful for everything. I am so thankful to be me; a writer and sister and daughter and granddaughter and friend, a cat-owner and household launderer, a tree-climber and tea-drinker and Once Upon A Time fan -- who is by the way quite excited for the season premier this Sunday! -- a two-year pianist (still awful at it), a bookworm, a reforming sugar addict (Truvia, my sweet-tooth friends, Truvia), and, best of all, a child of God.

    If there is one thing I have learned, the best remedy for feeling 'down' is listing off all of the gifts God has given me, and simply saying 'Thank You!'

The parlor of life does not seem quite as crowded now. It is easier to not drag my feet where God is leading me. The windows, open or closed, do not frighten or concern me as much as they have been.

    Remembering how God has cared for me all of my days so far helps me have faith that He will continue to uphold me and keep His promises for the future. And, as every Christian so joyfully hopes in,
"And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose." 

-Romans 8:28

Know... all things... good... love... purpose...

That hope certainly makes the burden of each day far, far easier to bear!

hope and praise

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Hope. That's what I feel right now. Amazing. God has brought peace; He is directing my heart back unto the path of righteousness. Our Pastor spoke this morning about Revelation chapters Four and Five, and spoke a great deal on Christ and the Rapture and the Second Coming. It reminded me, 'In Christ alone' (my life motto.) Amidst all of my confused and selfish feelings and thoughts these past couple of week that Christ is my Savior, my First Love, my all-in-all. His love is my comfort. I am so grateful! If you remember my last post, I was struggling a great deal. I willn't say that the struggle has been entirely eradicated; however, I can see the Lord working, and I know that He is strengthening me for all of my little trials.

Beacon of Hope is the best and strongest church I have ever known. It is home. It is family. And I would not trade a moment at church for anything else in all of creation! My friends are godly, swords sharpening my sword with their love and friendship. I stayed up late last night with one of my best friends at her house - I was sleeping over there with my sister - and we discussed all kinds of interesting and beautiful things. As we were talking I realized how much I have been taking her friendship for granted. (This is the same friend with whom I was stargazing last week.) God is using her to edify and grow me, more than she may ever know. Thank the Lord for her and her sweet family!

Actually, I have been taking pretty much everything in my life for granted, now that I think about it. My parents, siblings, cat, bedroom (all to myself), new antique chair, plenty of food to eat every day, my very own Bible that I can read freely all hours of the day.... I wonder how I can ever feel miserable. And yet, Christ is enough without all of these extra things. O Lord, forgive me for my constant selfishness; help me to thank You always for all of the gifts You have given me, and to love You more than any of them!

Hope. Knowing that in the end Christ is all that matters has lifted up my soul out of its pained confusion. I am simply content to be His. Praise the Lord!

the devouring of books...

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...and the adventures of spring

It's always a treat when one is able to sleep-in an extra hour and then wake up to see sunshine, feel the warmth of the day, and breathe a thankful prayer to God.

Lately, I've wanted nothing more than to READ. I've been having the worst time with self-control when it comes to reading my Bible first thing in the morning. I actually did it today, before anything else. As always, just finally obeying God brought a beautiful peace and joy into the day.

    Yesterday, I read Leviticus 26, which is about God promises, either for good things should they obey Him, or for punishment should they disregard Him and fall into sin. This is the first time I've ever read Leviticus all the way through (just chapter 27 left, then I'm done!), and I can absolutely see it's value as part of God's Word. That is to say, a lot of people don't find it necessary because it's so full of SACRIFICE and LAWS, and all kinds of things that Christians don't need in order to live to God in this age.

    But it is necessary.

    God takes sin very seriously, and He wants His people to be set apart from the sinful ways of the world, to live a righteous life and to give Him the glory. He promises to bless our obedience and provide for our needs, but He will discipline us if we should fall away into temptation, forgetting His promises.

    I believe God has preserved this record (Leviticus) for us to remind us of the importance of godliness, holiness, true faith; it isn't a prayer-a-day kind of lifestyle, it's COMPLETE DEVOTION to God! If He was willing to DIE to spare us from an eternity in hell - we who are sinful, unworthy sheep who will stray from fields of hearty food and protection for one blade of withered grass - then we better not waste this one short life we have, but cooperate with the Holy Spirit in order to be sanctified, in preparation for God's one day perfecting us and - at last! - the eternal bliss of heaven.

Oh, I could go on and on about all that forever!

Along with suchlike weighty thoughts, I've been having lots of pretty little dreams at night and a great deal of story inspiration. Having discovered Shannon Hale's eight month-old book Princess Academy: Palace of Stone, I've found an ocean of new ideas and insight into characters I've loved for years from the prequel, Princess Academy (which I've read four times). I always marvel at Shannon Hale's knowledge of her characters - she always knows just what they want, just how to express all that they think and feel, and just when to give them what they need or want most. I'm a terribly distracted reader, so it takes me forever to finish a book, but my word... when I sit down with this, it's really, really hard to put it away!

    As far as my novel-in-progress, I've been able to finish some exhaustive editing and am adding piece by piece to a new chapter. It takes self-control to jump on the laptop and work on my novel instead of rushing onto Pinterest or 700 other websites at my fingertips - it's so easy to run out of time in a day by wasting it on useless games. I don't like having hardly accomplished anything useful by the end of a day. When I procrastinate, I'm reminded of a favorite quote from Princess Academy:

No wolf falters before the bite

So strike

No hawk wavers before the dive

Just strike

When struggling with the desire to do something else besides writing, I say 'no' to my distractions and command myself, 'just do it, just work on it, and you'll be so, so glad you did'. (Which is pretty much what I had to do to get myself to read my Bible, even on such a beautiful, motivating day.)

I bought a new purse from Thirty-One, a cross-body, just large enough for a notepad, a smallish book, my mp3, a pen, various re-charger cords, my keys, my glasses case, travel toothbrush, flashlight, travel Bath & Body lotion, and my library card. Now, that probably sounds like a lot, but I usually carry all that plus two or three MORE books, a small journal, an extra one or two pens and a pencil, a camera or yarn and knitting needles, and sometimes a thermal tote besides all of that if I'm babysitting and need to pack food.

    So, yeah... I decided to downsize a bit, and although I love having a variety of things to read and no small amount of trinkets I probably won't end up using with me wherever I go, it has been nice to not have too much extra weight on my shoulders (literally). Besides, the new little purse is a cute style, and in a favorite teal/mint color that seems REALLY popular right now.

Tea. Thesaurus. Cashews. Books. Novel. Music. Blue dusk. Spring. God's Word. Life.

It has been a lovely day, full of much more than I mentioned to the brim of what a mostly-relaxing day can contain, including errands to the grocery store, bank, JoAnne Fabrics & Crafts (my little sister is making a Steampunk 1880's dress for her drama class performance next month), a visit to one of my best friends (the library; I now have four more books I've never read before), and naturally frequent trips to my imagination - but if I went into detail, you'd never reach the end of this post, or worse, be bored stiff before you came close. ;)
 

Thank you for reading this, even if only a tiny bit; the number of page-views I get encourage me to keep blogging, more than you know! God bless,

steps into spring

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Spring is on the move.

At least here in Minnesota, we've had a few fluctuating false springs so far as winter has fought to keep it's strength up --- but no longer. Snow is finally melting, and I'm beginning to feel the warm promise of flowers and all growing things in the air.

Though I've visited my blog so very little this winter, life has not hit a lull.

During this week of spring break, I have not been needed to babysit my niece, as is usually a regular part-time activity, and there haven't been any piano lessons --- two large chunks of my week (when you include the extra babysitting that goes along with the lessons). The week, however, has had no trouble at all filling itself up, as it always does.

I find myself still wasting plenty of time watching various movies, usually in the evening, a habit of which I am trying to rid myself.

I've made headway in my novel, and am almost done with a long-winded editing process so that I should be able to move on to just plain writing by Monday. (Hopefully....)

As much as I love The Goose Girl, and Melanie Dickerson's works, I think The Hobbit is moving up a long ways on the favorite books list. The first time I read it, I had a hard time picturing everything, but since An Unexpected Journey came to theaters, the story and even the characters have been come easier to keep track of, understand, and love. I'm reading the book for the second time, and should break down and purchase my own copy anytime the next time I babysit and have some spare cash. ;)

Spring means it's almost my little sister's birthday (Emily), which I probably look forward to more than my own! I have a few little presents for her already, and know about a few bigger ones from our older sister, Lilly. I think knowing helps me anticipate the day even more.

Spring also means that the snow will be melting soon, the grass and leaves will be coming back, and through all of this, I'll have some fresh scenes to take photos of. (I really want to practice portraits this spring, and I'm already scoping out some good sites for these.)

Spring is a wonderful motivator. After a good long winter, it's time to step outside, stretch out the hibernating cramps, and go do something!

~*~*~*~*~*~

Thank You, Lord, for another new year, 

and thank You especially for another Good Friday anniversary!

the Hobbit

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Yesterday I went to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected journey for the third time in theater. (Which is a first. I don't know if I've seen any other movie even just two times in theater before.) I started knitting a hat during the trailers and was about half-way through by the end of the movie (and that's mostly by feel, not by sight). My mom and sister, Emily, were with me --- I think we all agreed that The Hobbit gets better every time. (They were seeing it for only their second time because we all went to the midnight showing, and I went again the next day with a group of friends from church.) But seriously; I've started being able to quote it, memorized the dwarves' names (and faces!), and am determined to read The Hobbit again before the next two parts are released.

Martin Freeman is Bilbo Baggins, an actor whom I was first introduced to watching Wild Target, a comedy starring Bill Nighy, Emily Blunt, and Rupert Grint; then one night my sisters and I began watching the BBC television series Sherlock with Benedict Cumberbatch (who actually plays the dragon Smaug and the Necromancer in The Hobbit). It was shortly after that when we learned Martin Freeman was going to play the part of Bilbo, so naturally we were... well, ecstatic, really. He portrays Bilbo perfectly. He's the number one thing I like about The Hobbit, but believe me, not the only thing --- I like every detail. ;)

 

It's fascinating to look at the behind-the-scenes videos (such as the one above) which explain a good chunk of the work that goes into the making of The Hobbit. It really does take so much to make a movie worth watching, and I believe Peter Jackson and his capable crew did a fabulous job! I've heard people complain about The Hobbit 'not being as good as Lord of the Rings' or 'too silly' and suchlike. Well, truth is, The Hobbit is NOT as serious at the Lord of the Rings. I've heard that J.R.R. Tolkien actually wrote it to be a children's book. And The Lord of the Rings trilogy is frankly pretty dark. I appreciated the humor of The Hobbit because the end of the "LotR" (Lord of the Rings) trilogy when Frodo sails away just breaks my heart. I needed a little cheering-up, and An Unexpected Journey did just that for me.

And I know a lot of people thought it was a little stretched out, but seriously: what true fan can complain about having three whole movies made about a favorite novel, especially if they star Martin Freeman? There were actually aspects of the book I didn't fully understand, and other parts I couldn't really picture in my own imagination. An Unexpected Journey answered a lot of questions I had. And how often do we have the chance to see a fantastic book like this from another person's perspective, anyway? I can't help thinking that if J.R.R. Tolkien could see his books from Peter Jackson's perspective, he would be very well-pleased.

For those of you who loved The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey even half as much as I did (which is still saying a lot!), don't worry; The Desolation of Smaug comes out on December 13th of this year, and There and Back Again, on July 18th of 2014 (and that's only about half a year after part two!) We don't have that much of a wait ahead of us. And I plan on watching An Unexpected Journey several mores times when it finally comes out on DVD.

For those of you who didn't really like the movie all that much, think about the reasons for that. We geeks will allow you to be more interested in other movies --- everyone has their own tastes and is entitled to their own opinion --- but if your only excuse for disliking The Hobbit is because they're splitting it into three parts, just know that The Lord of the Rings was originally one book as well, but was separated into three parts because of its length! Length is a problem for you? *Chuckling ensues* Well, my friend, because I'm a true geek at heart, I'm hoping for more extended versions --- love those --- to put up on the shelf, next to The Avengers, Doctor Who, Merlin, Harry Potter, The Hunger Games, Star Trek, and every other 'geeky' movie or TV series I have on my rather extensive wishlist. Length is good.

Lastly, I want to ask everyone to do one thing concerning movies based on books; to give the movie an honest chance. Allow yourself to not be prejudiced, but see its quality in and of itself, even if you still like the book more. You really are seeing the book from someone else's perspective, seeing their very imagination, which is FASCINATING! Allow yourself to look over any quirks you don't care for and simply enjoy the movie. And please don't make judgments until you've seen a bit of all the work everyone put in to making that movie. (Particularly The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.) Could YOU have done a better job? Let's give Peter Jackson some major kudos for bringing The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings to life!

toothless ... part two

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Thank you to anyone who prayed for me during my wisdom tooth removal yesterday. If I could have had it go any way, I would have chosen just exactly what happened! I don't remember the surgery at all, just talking to the surgeons a little bit, then waking up in a cot with my mom next to me, and a nurse nearby. I tried to talk right away, which was really difficult because of numbing as well as the gauze in the back of my mouth --- that part made me tear-up in frustration --- but it wasn't more than a few minutes later before I was communicating all right. I started cracking jokes, which was my plan all along. I was perfectly content, and don't recall any pain at all. Actually, even when they had put the IV in for anesthesia (an experience I've heard an awful lot of unpleasant stories about), it wasn't that bad, not nearly as much as I expected. 

    It made me feel more confident.

Being wheeled out to the car was an interesting experience; it was weird to not be able to stand on my own two feet. My mom had the car pulled-up to the door, and she and the nurse helped carry me in. After that, I started to relax and almost fell asleep. Emily had been finishing babysitting for me, so we picked her up when we left the hospital, and then we stopped to pick up my prescribed pain-killers, then came home.

Em and mom helped support me up the stairs (we have a split-entry), and then into bed. Boy, it felt good to be drowsy and just rest! I still didn't feel any pain. Emily read Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets aloud until I fell asleep, and then later, she and Lilly were baking cookies around the time I woke up. I watched Once Upon a Time (my favorite TV show), and then Em and I watched some I Love Lucy and then X-Men United (the second one), but I don't think we finished it.

The lower left side of my face hurts when I touch it, which I believe is because that was the only wisdom tooth that hadn't started coming out, yet. So far, that's pretty much the only pain I've had, but for a little bit of soreness. And right now, I'm wide-awake, jolly, and even energetic. I went downstairs without trouble, have been getting all of my own food for myself. I'm not having any trouble with dizziness or weakness --- the truth is, I feel great!

Oh, and I actually did have one of my sisters' delicious cookies last night. They were freshly-baked, and therefore warm and soft. I nibbled off little pieces and rubbed them between my tongue and the roof of my mouth. Other than that, (and a half spoonful of cookie dough) I've stuck to completely soft foods like pudding and yogurt and a little ice cream, which are things I love to snack on any day. Despite all of the horror stories I've heard and the expectations of something going wrong, God and my family have been taking excellent care of me --- I'm wanting for nothing. And the oral surgeon said my swelling will be at it's peak tomorrow. Believe it or not, looking like a chipmunk is what I've been looking forward to the most! ;)

When the nurse settled me into the wheelchair right after I woke up from my surgery, I just wanted to sing praise to God! My heart was bursting with happiness and gratitude because of how well things went, and I'm still praising Him in my heart.

My mom is going to go see my grandparents tonight, and if I'm up to it, she might take me along! I'm excited; I haven't seen them since the beginning of the week, and I want to see how they're doing, and share my praise to God with them!

At this rate, I'll be feeling just great for church on Sunday, which is really good, because I'm helping set-up and training for the laptop slides!

Thank You, Lord, for making this such an easy, painless experience! All praise and glory be to You, for all that You are, and all that You have done!

               Amen.